Cranky Large Medium reading, 17 March

Go away.

Why won't you go? Is there some unseen force binding you to the spot? Did my karma run over your dogma? Please, what will it take for you to leave? Oh. Right. You want a reading. Well, here you are, then:

You are one cold fish. You would rather be left alone, most days, to wrap yourself in your philosophic maunderings. Why does this sound so familiar? Hmm. Anyway. You have strong opinions. Those who can get past your personality quirks and become your friends may be friends for life. Don't encourage them, unless you want to be called up in the middle of your favorite television shows, just so they can talk about shoe styles.

Are you happy, now? Of course not. That would require that you be a saint, and there's only one allowed to celebrate this day... Hand me a Guinness, will you? And get over yourself. At least you're still in the original upright position, as opposed to these people, all of whom, on this date in history, became living impaired: Titus Labienus, Marcus Aurelius, Harold Harefoot, Lulach I, Go-Saga, Ashikaga Yoshikazu, Giuliano di Lorenzo de' Medici, Susanna M. Salter, Menno van Coehoorn, George Parker, Daniel Bernoulli, Friedrich Bessel, Christian Doppler, Robert Chambers, Irene Joliot-Curie, Haldan Keffer Hartline, John Backus, Saint Patrick (well, duh!), Jocelin, Alexander Ales, Jean-Baptiste Rousseau, Andre Norton, Louis Kahn, Oleg Cassini, Terry Stafford, Pat Weaver, Fred Allen, Merritt Butrick, Rick Aviles, Bob Papenbrook, Grace Stafford, Helen Hayes, Mai Zetterling, Amos Alonzo Stagg, Paul Dean, Ray Meyer, Lawrence Oates, Austen Chamberlain, Santo Trafficante, Jr., Ronnie Kray, J. J. Jackson,

and Ric Grech.

Cry today, cry tomorrow, it's all the same.
Happy birthday, anyway.