Cranky Large Medium reading, 15 September

Go away.

What's keeping you? Why aren't you already hitting the road? Can't figure out the latch on the exit gate? It's pretty simple -- you just lift it, and it comes free. You know, like the pretty little butterfly that seems to be your conscious mind. So, now you can go. And still you stay. Why is that? Oh, right. You came here for something particular. Well, I'm pretty particular, but you can't have me. No, you don't want me? Whyever not? Did you deliberately come here to tease me? Ah. You deliberately came to ask me for a reading. And, you promise that, one I give you the reading, you will be happy and leave me alone again, no further insult to my elegant beauty and beguiling charms. Well, then, here you are:

You are excessively honest and frank; diplomacy and tact are by no means your strong point. Determined and energetic, you apply it consistently in the wrong direction. You are cheerfully oblivious, and can make light of any situation, especially if humor is inappropriate at the time.

Are you happy, now? Of course not. But who cares? At least we're honest with each other. And, at this moment, you can even look at yourself and recognize that you're still holding off the effects of gravity. That puts you ahead of these people, all of whom, on this date in history, surrendered to the gravest of gravity, the gravity of the grave: Constans II, Robert the Strong, Abraham Clark, Roman Ungern von Sternberg, Sir Jeremy Moore, Leonhard Rauwolf, Isambard Kingdom Brunel, Joseph Plateau, Ewostatewos, John Morton, Gian Francesco Albani, George Stepney, Robert Penn Warren, Oriana Fallaci, André Le Nôtre, Charles Theodore Pachelbel, Anton Webern, Bill Evans, Rafael Mendez, Charles M. "Cootie" Williams, John William Cummings aka Johnny Ramone, Sidney Luft, Milton Sills, Harold Bennett, John Hoyt, Brett Somers, Ethan Allen, William Huskisson, Sarah Knox Taylor, John Hanning Speke, Jumbo, Willy Messerschmitt,

and Richard W. "Rick" Wright.

In the scene, you should have been far away away away.
Happy birthday, anyway.