Cranky Large Medium reading, 4 May

Go away.

Why haven't you gone? Is this a test of the emergency bawdcast system? Are you going to buzz in my ear until I take shelter or tune to another station? When will you go? When you get your reading, you say? Well, then, why wait around? Let's get this puppy done! Here you are:

You are a smart-aleck, always tossing flip remarks and fancying yourself the wit of the town. Always doing the unexpected, sometimes not even getting caught by the police, you are outgoing and popular with a certain subset of society -- mostly those with the maturity of a kindergartener. Naturally, that is the age group with which you most identify.

Are you happy, now? Of course not. At least you have your life, though. Think of yourself as better off than these people, all of whom, on this date in history, stopped maturing and started to ripen, instead: Engelbrekt Engelbrektsson, Edward of Westminster, Edmund Beaufort, Husayn Bayqarah, Lorenzo II de' Medici, Matthew Tilghman, Tipu Sultan, Luca Ghini, Adriaan van Roomen, Isaac Barrow, Milan Rastislav Štefánik, Joseph Joubert, Eustace Budgell, James Thornhill, Jacques Saly, Hokusai, Bob Clampett, Noel Rosa, George Enescu, Paul Butterfield, Harry Moses Horwitz aka Moe Howard, Anita Stewart, Diana Dors, John Nevison, Josip Broz, David Hackworth,

and Emily Remler.

Madness, indeed.
Happy birthday, anyway.