Cranky Large Medium reading, 4 April

Go away.

Will you please go? What did I ever do to you, to drive you to torment me in my intended solitude? Oh, because I'm a medium, you have to make me small, do you? Well, let me tell you something....what? Oh, you only came for a quick reading, and then you'll go, as I wish. How kind of you. So, I suppose I might as well give you what you came to me for. Here you are:

You are supremely ambitious and apt to over-do in your drive for success. In other words, your personal drive to get more usually gets you less. Don't let that get you down. There are so many other, better reasons for disappointment, such as your social life and your chances for true love. You are capable of many things, as long as you show restraint, which is not in your character, so forget that. You're sunk by your own drives.

Are you happy, now? Of course not. You want more, more, more. I'm telling you, what you have now beats what most people who were born on this planet have, so you could learn to appreciate it. After all, you could be like them and like the following people, all of whom, on this date in history, bit the big biscuit: André Masséna, William Henry Harrison, John McLean, Charles de L'Ecluse, John Napier, Joseph Jérôme Lefrançais de Lalande, Heinrich Gustav Magnus, Charles Ernest Beulé, Heinrich Wilhelm Dove, Peter Cooper, Edmond Hébert, William Crookes, John Venn, Karl Benz, Wilhelm Ostwald, Simion Stoilow, Harry Nyquist, St. Ambrose, Saint Isidore of Seville, Pope Formosus, Pope Nicholas IV, Simon Episcopius, Martin Luther King, Jr., Chögyam Trungpa, Oliver Goldsmith, Catherine Lucille Moore, Max Frisch, Theodore Gardelle, Ludwig Emil Grimm, Al Lewis, Stefan Wolpe, Arthur Russell, Bob Clark, Edgar Buchanan, Kenny Everett, Harry L. O'Connor, Anthony Caruso, Gloria Swanson, Priscilla Lane, Forrest Towns, Early Wynn, Terry Hall, James Sykes, Solomon Sibley, Richard Brewer, André Michelin, Johnny Stompanato, Adam Clayton Powell Jr., H. John Heinz III, Alfred Butts, Casey Sheehan,

and Red Sovine.

I'm afraid he's not going to hold anything, any more.
Happy birthday, anyway.