Cranky Large Medium reading, 17 April

Go away.

Aren't you gone yet? What is keeping you? Can't find your legs? Maybe you should have thought of that before you got into that position. Now all you're serving to do is to make me snicker. And that makes me hungry for a candy bar. So, please go, before I bite your butterfingers off. Why aren't you gone? You came here for... a reading. Ugh. Ah, well, if that's all it takes to get rid of you, I can probably pore over the Milky Way to see what's in the stars for you. Here you are:

You are a lazy bookworm who imagines the priority is always intellectual, but needs to get out and work on the body, even more than the mind. You should not ever go off your meds; being bipolar means having to say you're sorry twice as often. When it comes to love, you are exceedingly needy, and crave understanding you will never find. Especially here.

Are you happy, now? Of course not. Happiness should come from understanding, and there is none here. But you should look on the bright side -- at least you're still walking, as opposed to these people, all of whom, on this date in history, found the final answer: Alexander of Alexandria, Joseph I, David Hollatz, Benjamin Franklin, Alexander Mackenzie, Thomas Bayes, Samuel Morey, George Jennings, Jean Perrin, Henrik Dam, Roger Wolcott Sperry, Proclus, Kateri Tekakwitha, Yi Sang, Richard Jupp, Fyodor Petrovich Tolstoy, Alexander Golovin, Louise Nevelson, Johann Mattheson, Henry "Red" Allen, Felix Pappalardi, Earl Silas Johnson IV aka Earl King, Danny Federici, Soundarya, Kitty Carlisle, Claude Provost, Ralph Abernathy, Linda McCartney, Paul Getty,

and Eddie Cochran.

Too tired to rock? Just because you had to climb a mountain to get here. Pah!
Happy birthday, anyway.