Cranky Large Medium reading, 19 March

Go away.

When will you be gone? When will I have peace again? (Wait. Have I ever had peace?) When will you turn around and head back home, to leave me with my own thoughts, such as they are? When I give you a reading? As soon as that? Hot Diggety! Here you are, then:

You're a regular hausfrau. You take care of home and family, show all the warm fuzzy skills of a Walt Disney mommy, and wear your heart on your sleeve. If your home is not filled with chirping birds and harmony at all times, you whine and make everybody else miserable. You need an exceptional amount of affection, understanding and attention. Check your antidepressant levels, adjust them, and get back to your normal treacly self.

Are you happy, now? Of course not. There is a squeaking hinge somewhere in your house. Hey, at least it's moving, as are you. You and the hinge could be much worse off -- you could be like these people, each of whom, on this date in history, became stiff: Emperor Bing of Song, Uesugi Kagekatsu, Lloyd L. Gaines, Philip Mazzei, Wilhelm Karl Ritter von Haidinger, Giuseppe Mercalli, Clinton Hart Merriam, Walter Haworth, Gaston Julia, Louis, 7th duc de Broglie, Hugh of St Cher, Thomas Ken, Pope Clement XI, Ibn Khaldun, Thomas Killigrew, Edgar Rice Burroughs, Sir Arthur C. Clarke, Vasily Surikov, Anne Klein, Garry Winogrand, Willem de Kooning, Nicolaus Bruhns, Randy Rhoads, Andrew Wood, Luther Ingram, Edward Platt (sorry about that, Chief), Richard Beckinsale, Cesare Danova, Yasuo Yamada, Calvert DeForest, Robert Cavelier de La Salle, John Bingham, Frank Nitti, William Hale Thompson, Charles K. Johnson, John De Lorean,

and Paul Kossoff.

Now you're trying to trick me in love.
Happy birthday, anyway.