Cranky Large Medium reading, 8 February

Go away.

Please. Leave. Why aren't you gone? Did I somehow miss a memo requiring that you stay and torment me with your presence while I strive for peace and solitude? Oh, no, you're another of those people who can't figure out who you are without hearing it from a grumpy stranger. Well, since you require the reading, I will give it to you, on the stipulation that you then go away. Fair enough? Good. Then here you are:

With a spongelike memory, one might think you could get places, but, so far, it hasn't even gotten you to a Jeopardy! championship, has it? That's because a sponge is, by nature, full of holes, and you are dogmatic instead of pragmatic about thought in general. You don't open up to anything even remotely daring, and that includes business and love. You'll be alone all your life because you can't accept anybody at their apparent worth.

Are you happy, now? Of course not. Sponge or sop, there's no smiling. But look on the bright side -- at least you're still soaking it up, as opposed to these people, all of whom, on this date in history, became no longer a factor: Alexius IV Angelus, William II Longespee, Hulagu Khan, Mary, Queen of Scots, Tsar Ivan V, Tsar Peter I, Charles Curtis, Agostino Bassi, Hendrik Willem Bakhuis Roozeboom, Walther Bothe, John von Neumann, Ernst Kretschmer, Robert Robinson, Julian Lincoln Simon, Aaron Hill, Iris Murdoch, Jan van Huysum, George Dance the Elder, Giles Gilbert Scott, Julius Schwartz, Giuseppe Torelli, Raymond Scott, James Oscar "Jimmy" Smith, Keith Knudsen, Elton Dean, Akira Ifukube, George Formby (Senior), George Dolenz, Harriet E. MacGibbon, Connie Mack, Del Ennis, Sid Abel, Derrick Thomas, Peter Kropotkin, Vincent "Mad Dog" Coll, John Hay Whitney, William Lyons, Bob Collins, Anna Nicole Smith

and Del Shannon.

Hats off, toes up.
Happy birthday, anyway.