Cranky Large Medium reading, 17 January

Go away.

Why do you yet stand there? Have you nothing better to do than to torment a pitiable medium? Why must you pester me so? Is it simply because I am beautiful, or is there something more? Ah. Yes. I see. You want a reading from me. More is the pity, I have one. For you and you alone (well, along with anybody else born on this date):

Keep throwing yourself at that brick wall, you may eventually crash through it into success. You don't take sides (probably because you can't see either side clearly enough to make a decision) and you go all soft and gushy over every little thing. Your true happiness will be found in a deep and trusting love, which will never come your way if your mother has anything to say about it.

Are you happy, now? Of course not. Your mother says you won't be, so there you are. Still, at least you're a step up from these people, all of whom, on this date in history, returned to Mother Earth: Theodosius I, Fyodor I, Captain Benjamin Church, Rutherford B. Hayes, Albert Jacka, Pyotr Krasnov, Barbara Jordan, John Ray, Giovanni Aldini, Hermann Schlegel, Clyde Tombaugh, Albert Schatz, Bishop Karas, George Bancroft, T.H. White, Betty Smith, Albert Hourani, Gregory Corso, Art Buchwald, Matthäus Daniel Pöppelmann, Horace Vernet, Ignaz Wechselmann, Louis Comfort Tiffany, Jean-François Dandrieu, Tomaso Albinoni, Juan Crisóstomo Arriaga, David "Junior" Kimbrough, Ray Stark, Winstead "Doodles" Weaver, Richard Crenna, Noble Willingham, Allan Melvin, Evelyn Nesbit, Queenie Leonard, Virginia Mayo, Walter Briggs, Sr., Frank Pullen, Helen Stephens, Harry Brecheen, Bobby Fischer, Lola Montez, Chang and Eng Bunker, Sir Francis Galton, Juliette Gordon Low, Grand Duke Peter Nikolaevich of Russia, Gary Gilmore, Charlie Bell,

and Billy Stewart.

Somethin's 'bout to get you.
Happy birthday, anyway.