Friday, September 18, 2009

Cranky Large Medium reading, 18 September

Go away.

Will you please leave? Why aren't you going, yet? What is it that keeps you standing there gaping like a drainpipe? Did you lose track of up and down? Did you forever forget how to walk away? Please, why won't you go? Oh, I see, you came here for something you think I can give you. Well, looking around the place, I'm thinking I have a little grass, a few rocks, and... no, you can't have the shirt off my back -- it's not a shirt, it's a blanket, and it covers more than my back. Trust me, you don't want that shown all over the place. Oh, I see, you don't want my blanket, you only want a reading. Only. Sheesh. As if those readings were a dime a dozen. Well, maybe a quarter a dozen, this week. Oh, heck, this one will be free, as long as you promise you'll be satisfied once you get it, and you'll just skedaddle on home. Groovy, you consent to my terms. Pardon my happy little jig. Here you are, now:
You can't decide whether to be diffident or tender, headstrong or understanding, or impetuous. You can be kind, though. What kind, I don't know. You are a good planner, and a better opportunist. You form friendships easily, but that doesn't mean you know how to keep them. You might fall in love at first sight. You might not, also. Either way, you'll probably not be satisfied with what you get in return.
Are you happy, now? Of course not. That would mean you've made up your mind about something. Well, when you finally come around to a decision about yourself, you might actually realize that you have it pretty good. After all, you can still waffle all you want about your feelings. That puts you far and away in a better position than these people, all of whom, on this date in history, assumed a permanent subterranean horizontal position: Domitian, Pietro I Candiano, Toyotomi Hideyoshi, Dag Hammarskjöld, Leonhard Euler, William Ferrel, Hippolyte Fizeau, John Cockcroft, Paul Bernays, Melchior Klesl, St Joseph of Cupertino, Benjamin Kennicott, August Gottlieb Spangenberg, George MacDonald, Matthew Prior, Robert Pollok, William Hazlitt, Stanisław Ignacy Witkiewicz, Clive Bell, Sean O'Casey, Katherine Anne Porter, Norman Cantor, Jimmy Witherspoon, Frank Morgan, Charles de Tornaco, Vitas Gerulaitis, Bob Hayes, Patrick Cotter O'Brien, Joseph Locke, Robert G. Cole
and Jimi Hendrix.

'Scuze me while I kiss this guy.
Happy birthday, anyway.

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