Cranky Large Medium reading, 25 July

Go away.

Why won't you go? Did somebody fill you with daft notions of sharing the life of a recluse? Silly, silly you! Oh, no, that's not why you're here. You just came to pester me about something, didn't you? What is it you want (or do I really have to ask)? Right. Reading. You want one. Sigh. If I give you one promptly, you'll go, right? Right. Look at me smiling. I'm grinning like an idiot at the prospect of you going. So. Here you are:

You make friends easily and have a magnetic personality, so avoid Iron Man, at all costs. With good business sense, executive ability and too much luck in all your dealings, you are very likely to engender envy. In me, first. You should probably get used to wearing shin guards.

Are you happy, now? Of course not. You're just plain smug, you barstidge! And you probably know deep in your bones how much better off you are than these people, who, as of this date in history, moved to the Bone Garden : Constantius Chlorus, Isaac Low, Andreas Libavius, Charles Macintosh, Ludwig Bölkow, Tracy Hall, Pope Innocent VIII, John Taylor, François Hédelin, Samuel Taylor Coleridge, Hal Foster, Charlie Rich, Tal Farlow, Erik Brann, Vincente Minnelli, John Schlesinger, Alfred Drake, Howard Vernon, Judith Barsi, Bryan Hextall, Ben Hogan, "James Barry", François Coty, Carl Brashear,

and Willie Mae "Big Mama" Thornton.

Now, go down home.
Happy birthday, anyway.