Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Cranky Large Medium reading, 14 April

Go away.

Why aren't you at least halfway to somewhere else, by now? Is there some problem with your feet? Do they smell, and your nose run -- proof that you were assembled backward? Oh, you just came up here to ruin my day by making me work, right? Well, foo on you. All I'll do for labor is sit and see, and maybe do a little light reading. Hmm. That's all you want, is a little light reading? Will you settle for what I see, then, and shortly thereafter, skedaddle? Great! Here you are, then:
You may have a mind that's sharp as a tack, but tacks rust when you don't take care of them. Go buy some intellectual naval jelly, or something. Aww, have I offended your puffy soft and squishy feelings? That's what you get for leaning on a cactus. Still, at least you can learn how to be practical, if necessary. And it will be necessary. Take it easy on the displays of affection, especially for those you can't afford (pretty much everybody, these days, isn't it?).
Are you happy, now? Of course not. Still, while you complain about what a life you have, it has to beat what these people have, since all of them, on this date in history, somehow misplaced their lives, permanently: Richard Neville, Louis of Nassau, Henri Elzéar Taschereau, Maximilian Hell (Hell studied the heavens. Cool.), Ludovich Lazarus Zamenhof, Amalie Emmy Noether, Tatyana Alexeyevna Afanasyeva, Phil Katz, Richard Aungerville, Avvakum, Sri Ramana Maharshi, Simone de Beauvoir, Mikhail Vrubel, John Singer Sargent, Ollie Johnston, George Frideric Handel (250 years gone, this year), Pete Farndon, Thurston Harris, Don Ho, Hiroshi Teshigahara, Fredric March, Anthony Newley, Ellen Corby, Addie Joss, Al Benton, Stanley "Frenchy" Bordagaray, Tommy Holmes, Guillermo Kahlo, Rachel Carson,
and Burl Ives.

Peas, peas, peas, eatin' goober peas on earth.
Happy birthday, anyway
(and an especially happy one to the Brugly Other).

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