Cranky Large Medium reading, 22 January

Go away.

Weren't you just leaving? Well, set those boots to walking. Why are you still here? Oh, right. The reading. If you must, then here you have it:

You are egotistical, a fop, and overly concerned with others' opinions of yourself. Secretive, you can still put on a show of being loving and affectionate, so you will probably not be alone in your final hours -- but your choice of company and habits will hasten those hours.

Are you happy, now? Of course not. I didn't meet your standards for sycophancy, effusion suck-uppedness. Well, tough stuff. At least you have a better arrangement than these people, all of whom, on this date in history, sucked up their last breaths: Shah Jahan, Queen Victoria, Lyndon B. Johnson, ... Johann Gottlob Lehmann, Jeremiah Dixon, Johann Friedrich Blumenbach, Camille Jordan, ... Bernhard Knipperdolling, Pope Benedict XV, ... William Thomas Walsh, Abe Kobo, Craig Claiborne, ... Bill Mauldin, ... Cristofano Malvezzi, David E. Hughes, Tommy Tucker, Rhett Forrester, Billy May, ... Alan Hale, Sr., Herbert Marshall, Parker Fennelly, Telly Savalas, Roy Brown, Roberto Gari, Heath Ledger, ... Alma Rubens, Ann Miller, ... Mike Hawthorn, Duke Kahanamoku, Jerry Blackwell, Tommie Agee, César Gutiérrez, ... Joseph Philo Bradley, Captain George Streeter, Karl Nessler, Ishtiaq Hussain Qureshi, Budd Dwyer, Rose Fitzgerald Kennedy, Rose Mary Woods, Miles Lerman,

and Billy Mackenzie.

Gloomy every day, aren't we?
Happy birthday, anyway.