Friday, October 27, 2006

Friday Catblog: Rime of the ancient kitty

Usually-photogenic Furfur has acted toward the camera as if he were Alec Baldwin and I the paparazzi. Furfur Hates Paparazzi
(Must be the normal reaction of a black cat to the approach of Halloween.)

Therefore, I have sought out offerings from before I was born; I raided Carolyn Wells' book, Such Nonsense! again, and found these works -- of a cat and kittens in disguise, and the torment and loss suffered by another poor feline:

Mer-Cat

ODE TO A BOB-TAILED CAT

Felis Infelix! Cat unfortunate,
With nary narrative!
Canst thou no tail relate
Of how
(Miaow!)
Thy tail end came to terminate so bluntly
Didst wear it off by
Sedentary habits
As do the rabbits?

Didst go a
Fishing with it,
Wishing with it
To "bob" for catfish,
And get bobbed thyself?
Curses on that fish!

Didst lose it in kittenhood,
Hungrily chawing it?
Or, gaily pursuing it,
Did make it tangent
From thy swift circuit?

Did some brother Greyback ––
Yowling
And howling
In nocturnal strife,
Spitting and staring
Cursing and swearing,
Ripping and tearing,
Calling thee "Sausagetail,"
Abbreviate thy suffix?

Or did thy jealous wife
Detect yer
In some sly flirtation,
And after caudal lecture,
Bite off thy termination?
And sarve yer right!

Did some mischievous boy,
Some barbarous boy,
Eliminate thy finis?
(Probably!)
The wretch!
The villain!
Cruelly spillin'
Thy innocent blood!

Furiously scratch him
Where'er yer may catch him!

Well, Bob, this course is now left,
Since thus of your tail you're bereft :
Tell your friend that by letter
From Paris
You have learned the style there is
To wear the tail short
And the briefer the better ;
Such is the passion,
That every Grimalkin will
Follow your fashion.

-ANON


Looking for more cats, with tails and all? Be sure to stop by Modulator for Friday Ark #110. On Sunday, don't forget the Halloween edition of the Carnival of the Cats at Watermark.

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